Parent's Influence on Teen Drinking

Source: Connect with Kids

“My parents are pretty powerful in my life. I have their respect, and they have mine.”
– Deepak, 16 years old

Teenagers are bound to experiment with drugs, alcohol and sex – right?

Not necessarily, says 15-year-old Nick. “It’s not inevitable,” he says. “It’s just a personal decision.”

“There’s [sic] a lot of people who just don’t want to try any of that stuff, but there are some people who do,” says 15-year-old Chris Mullings.

The Journal of Studies on Alcohol and Drugs reports that when underage drinkers are disciplined by their parents they are less likely to become heavy drinkers compared to kids whose parents ignore their drinking.

“My parents have a pretty big influence on everything that I believe in – what I will and won’t do,” says Elizabeth, 15.

Nick echoes her sentiments. “For all my decisions, I’m always thinking about what they taught me, and even if I don’t do what they said, it’s still always in my head,” he says.

What’s more, teens themselves say parents help them make healthy choices by talking to them and knowing where they are, whom they’re with and what they’re doing. And when their expectations are clear.

“If they have heard what you think is appropriate behavior and you have modeled it, when they are in a position where they have to think critically, they have already had a chance to, in some ways, rehearse it,” says psychologist Dr. Peter Thomas.

And, experts say, if you find your teen has been experimenting- speak up!

“By not commenting directly, they’re, in essence, giving their child permission to continue to drink or get stoned or do whatever they’re doing because the child will interpret their silence as its okay, it doesn’t matter,” explains psychologist, Alexandra Phipps. “I would tell parents if you don’t talk about things with your child, it’s probably going to happen again and again and it’s probably going to get worse.”

Tips for Parents

Research defines binge drinking as having five or more drinks in a row. Reasons adolescents give for binge drinking include: to get drunk, the status associated with drinking, the culture of drinking on campus, peer pressure and academic stress. Binge drinkers are 21 times more likely to: miss class, fall behind in schoolwork, damage property, injure themselves, engage in unplanned and/or unprotected sex, get in trouble with the police, and drink and drive.
Young people who binge drink could be risking serious damage to their brains now and increasing memory loss later in adulthood. Adolescents may be even more vulnerable to brain damage from excessive drinking than older drinkers.

Consider the following:

The average girl takes her first sip of alcohol at age 13. The average boy takes his first sip of alcohol at age 11.

Underage drinking causes over $53 billion in criminal, social and health problems.

Seventy-seven percent of young drinkers get their liquor at home, with or without permission.

Students who are binge drinkers in high school are three times more likely to binge drink in college.

Nearly 25 percent of college students report frequent binge drinking, that is, they binged three or more times in a two-week period.

Autopsies show that patients with a history of chronic alcohol abuse have smaller, less massive and more shrunken brains.

Alcohol abstinence can lead to functional and structural recovery of alcohol-damaged brains.
Alcohol is America’s biggest drug problem. Make sure your child understands that alcohol is a drug and that it can kill him/her. Binge drinking is far more pervasive and dangerous than boutique pills and other illicit substances in the news. About 1,400 students will die of alcohol-related causes this year. An additional 500,000 will suffer injuries.

A study by the Harvard School of Public Health showed that 51 percent of male college students and 40 percent of female college students engaged in binge drinking in the previous two weeks. Half of these drinkers binged frequently (more than three times per week). College students who binge drink report:

Interruptions in sleep or study habits (71 percent).
Caring for an intoxicated student (57 percent).
Being insulted or humiliated (36 percent).
An unwanted sexual experience (23 percent).
A serious argument (23 percent).
Damaging property (16 percent).
Being pushed, hit or assaulted (11 percent).
Being the victim of a sexual advance assault or date rape (1 percent).

Students must arrive on college campuses with the ability to resist peer pressure and knowing how to say no to alcohol. For many youngsters away from home for the first time, it is difficult to find the courage to resist peer pressure and the strength to answer peer pressure with resounding no. Parents should foster such ability in their child’s early years and nurture it throughout adolescence. Today’s youth needs constant care from parents and community support to make the best decisions for their wellbeing.

References
Alcohol Policies Project
Focus Adolescent Services
Harvard School of Public Health
National Youth Violence Prevention Center
Psychological Assessment Research & Treatment Services

Drinking Roommate

Source: Connect with Kids

“It’s about toughening up and getting coping strategies to deal with the temptations and the problems with roommates.”

– John Lochridge, M.D., Psychiatrist

College freshman Max Bluestein has three roommates. Each spends their time very differently. “One doesn’t drink at all, one drinks a little bit and one drinks a lot,” he says.

And the one who drinks a lot is often coaxing him to skip his studies, and go out. “It’s a lot of peer pressure just to go out a lot,” explains Bluestein.

A study of more than 30,000 college freshman finds that 35 percent of students report spending more time drinking (ten hours a week) than they do studying (just eight hours).

And many say the problem is made worse by a roommate who drinks.

“When somebody’s having fun you don’t want to be sitting there reading and what not,” says freshman Parham Savadkoohi.

“Your mind will be focused on drinking,” says Sophomore Nikki Lee.

“And I know I have a paper due or something I might go and hang out for a little while. It is kind of hard,” says freshman Kristen Collier.

Experts say the problem of underage drinking in college needs to be solved long before college. In high school, parents need to allow kids just enough room to make small mistakes, followed by consequences.

“And if they make other mistakes they get consequences, and through the consequences they learn about decision and then when they get off to college, they’ve had experience at both decision making and consequences, and are perhaps better able to handle these things on their own in college,” explains psychiatrist, Dr. John Lochridge.

“I know what my priorities are, I’ll get my work done though… it is hard,” says Collier.

Tips for Parents

Research defines binge drinking as having five or more drinks in a row. Reasons adolescents give for binge drinking include: to get drunk, the status associated with drinking, the culture of drinking on campus, peer pressure and academic stress. Binge drinkers are 21 times more likely to: miss class, fall behind in schoolwork, damage property, injure themselves, engage in unplanned and/or unprotected sex, get in trouble with the police, and drink and drive.

Young people who binge drink could be risking serious damage to their brains now and increasing memory loss later in adulthood. Adolescents may be even more vulnerable to brain damage from excessive drinking than older drinkers. Consider the following:

The average girl takes her first sip of alcohol at age 13. The average boy takes his first sip of alcohol at age 11.

Underage drinking causes over $53 billion in criminal, social and health problems.

Seventy-seven percent of young drinkers get their liquor at home, with or without permission.
Students who are binge drinkers in high school are three times more likely to binge drink in college.

Nearly 25 percent of college students report frequent binge drinking, that is, they binged three or more times in a two-week period.

Autopsies show that patients with a history of chronic alcohol abuse have smaller, less massive and more shrunken brains.

Alcohol abstinence can lead to functional and structural recovery of alcohol-damaged brains.
Alcohol is America’s biggest drug problem. Make sure your child understands that alcohol is a drug and that it can kill him/her. Binge drinking is far more pervasive and dangerous than boutique pills and other illicit substances in the news. About 1,400 students will die of alcohol-related causes this year. An additional 500,000 will suffer injuries.

A study by the Harvard School of Public Health showed that 51 percent of male college students and 40 percent of female college students engaged in binge drinking in the previous two weeks. Half of these drinkers binged frequently (more than three times per week). College students who binge drink report:

Interruptions in sleep or study habits (71 percent).
Caring for an intoxicated student (57 percent).
Being insulted or humiliated (36 percent).
An unwanted sexual experience (23 percent).
A serious argument (23 percent).
Damaging property (16 percent).
Being pushed, hit or assaulted (11 percent).
Being the victim of a sexual advance assault or date rape (1 percent).

Students must arrive on college campuses with the ability to resist peer pressure and knowing how to say no to alcohol. For many youngsters away from home for the first time, it is difficult to find the courage to resist peer pressure and the strength to answer peer pressure with resounding no. Parents should foster such ability in their child's early years and nurture it throughout adolescence. Today’s youth needs constant care from parents and community support to make the best decisions for their wellbeing.

References
Centers for Disease Control and Prevention
Harvard School of Public Health
National Youth Violence Prevention Center

Middle School Drinking

Source: Connect with Kids

“We’ve approached parenting as a life-long process and this is just part of it. We’re just starting him, training him, helping him get set for the rest of his life - to make his own decisions.”

– Jon Schlanger, Jake’s father

“I’ve heard in other schools that people have been sneaking drugs into their lockers,” Jake says. He’s only ten years old, and he already knows kids who use drugs.

Experts say that today, children younger than ever are exposed to themes once reserved for adults: sex, violence, profanity - as well as drugs and alcohol.

“I think they’re pushed,” explains educator Kay Scott. “You know, pushed by music, pushed by movies, and pushed in some ways by the media.”

Experts add that parents aren’t teaching their elementary school-age kids about the dangers of alcohol.

As Dr. Michael Fishman, an addiction medicine specialist, explains, “Many of the parents are not getting involved as much with kids around education, around negative experiences they’ve had with drugs and alcohol.”

And that’s why Jake’s parents began that conversation two years ago. His father is a recovering alcoholic.

“That was a part of our life and it is a part of our life, so it was appropriate for this family to have that conversation at the time,” says Jon Schlanger, Jake’s dad.

One specific worry for them is that Jake inherited his dad’s genes.

“If one of the parents has the disease of alcoholism, I think at a minimum it’s 25% more likely [that the child will inherit the disease],” explains Dr. Fishman.

Another concern is his age. “The younger they start drinking, the higher risk they’re going to have for alcohol abuse or alcohol dependence,” he continues.

Which is why, Dr. Fishman says every family needs to start the conversation early: “I think the young people are much more aware and ready than many parents may believe.”

Jake’s dad knows he was ready for it, too. “In one respect it forces me to be honest about it; in another aspect, and this was very important to me, is for him to see that when I had a problem that I would try to face it and work through it.”

Tips for Parents

Alcohol-related fatalities are a leading cause of death among young adults in the United States. In the United States, 70.8 percent of all deaths among persons aged 10 to 24 result from only four causes – motor-vehicle crashes, other unintentional injuries, homicide and suicide.

Should your family doctor take just a few moments to counsel your child about the risks of alcohol, there is great potential for positive outcome. Just a few minutes of a doctor's counseling helped young adults reduce their high-risk drinking and the number of traffic crashes, emergency room visits, and arrests for substance or liquor violations, says a study in the Annals of Family Medicine. Consider the following:

Underage drinking causes over $53 billion in criminal, social and health problems.
Alcohol is a leading factor in the three leading causes of death for 15 to 24-year-olds: automobile crashes, homicide and suicide.

Primary-care doctors should make it a priority to counsel young adults about high-risk drinking.

Young adults, ages 18 to 30, who received counseling about reducing their use of alcohol:

Experienced a 40 to 50 percent decrease in alcohol use.
Reported 42 percent fewer visits to the emergency room.
Were involved in 55 percent fewer motor vehicle crashes.
The ways a parent can influence his or her teen’s drinking habits is complex. A universal method regarding what works best in preventing underage drinking may not exist. A study published in the Journal of Adolescent Health found that a parent’s attitude toward drinking influences a child's behavior in various ways. Researchers found that teens who drank with their parents were less likely than others to have binged or used alcohol at all in recent weeks.

The study also found that strict parenting can curb kids' drinking. Teens who said they feared they would have their privileges taken away if they got caught drinking were half as likely to drink as those who thought their parents would not punish them. In addition, consider the following:

The average girl takes her first sip of alcohol at age 13. The average boy takes his first sip of alcohol at age 11.
Teenagers who said their parents or their friends' parents had provided alcohol for a party over the past year were twice as likely as their peers to have used alcohol or binged during the previous month.
Nearly 75 percent of teens surveyed said they had never used alcohol.
About 25 percent of teens in the study said they'd been at party in the past year where parents supplied alcohol.
Fourteen percent of teens surveyed said they were with their parents the last time they drank.

References
The Centers for Disease Control
Focus Adolescent Services
National Youth Violence Prevention Center
U.S. Department of Health and Human Services
U.S. Surgeon General

Binge Drinking by Connect with Kids

“There’s this idea that drinking, getting drunk, being a part of a group … is somehow a part of our growing up, and everybody’s going to do it.”

– Robert Margolis, Ph.D., clinical psychologist

Binge drinking is considered to be a rite of passage for teenagers across the country. “I drank a liter of tequila in an hour, and I went to this pizza place, and I passed out in the parking lot. I woke up the next morning,” remembers Cleophus Randolph, a 22-year-old college student.

Suzanne Graham had a similar experience: “This summer I went kind of crazy, the summer after senior year, I passed out in someone’s backyard. It was not good, and I was throwing up pretty heavily the next day and all that night.”

The consequences can range from sickness to far worse — “where they don’t get a second chance because they get alcohol poisoning. Their heart rate and their body metabolism slows down and, for whatever reason, they don’t recover from it. If you drink enough alcohol you die,” explains Dr. Robert Margolis, clinical psychologist.

His advice is to set clear boundaries for your children. Tell them what to expect, teach them how to say no, and, most of all, start early. He says middle school is the perfect time. “Those are the years when you really need to start talking about those messages, so you can help them form appropriate expectations about drinking, particularly in regard to important issues like, you can be accepted without having to drink.”

Dr. Margolis empathizes with parents who feel they’re standing alone against a part of the culture that believes teenage drinking is inevitable. “There’s this idea that drinking, getting drunk, being a part of a group, that we’re all gonna go out and get drunk, is somehow a part of our growing up, and everybody’s going to do it.”

And, sadly every year some kids die — an estimated 1,400 students die from alcohol related causes. Another 500,000 suffer serious injuries. In fact, getting “wasted” is so common that some kids even think it’s funny, like 18-year-old Jason Morgan: “I’ve had friends just outside the door, heaving. It wasn’t bad, it was a good time for most, and entertaining for the sober people to laugh at them, so it was pretty fun.”

Tips for Parents

Research defines binge drinking as having five or more drinks in a row. Reasons adolescents give for binge drinking include: to get drunk, the status associated with drinking, the culture of drinking on campus, peer pressure and academic stress. Binge drinkers are 21 times more likely to: miss class, fall behind in schoolwork, damage property, injure themselves, engage in unplanned and/or unprotected sex, get in trouble with the police, and drink and drive.

Young people who binge drink could be risking serious damage to their brains now and increasing memory loss later in adulthood. Adolescents may be even more vulnerable to brain damage from excessive drinking than older drinkers. Consider the following:

The average girl takes her first sip of alcohol at age 13. The average boy takes his first sip of alcohol at age 11.

Underage drinking causes over $53 billion in criminal, social and health problems.

Seventy-seven percent of young drinkers get their liquor at home, with or without permission.

Students who are binge drinkers in high school are three times more likely to binge drink in college.

Nearly 25 percent of college students report frequent binge drinking, that is, they binged three or more times in a two-week period.

Autopsies show that patients with a history of chronic alcohol abuse have smaller, less massive and more shrunken brains.

Alcohol abstinence can lead to functional and structural recovery of alcohol-damaged brains.

Alcohol is America’s biggest drug problem. Make sure your child understands that alcohol is a drug and that it can kill him/her. Binge drinking is far more pervasive and dangerous than boutique pills and other illicit substances in the news. About 1,400 students will die of alcohol-related causes this year. An additional 500,000 will suffer injuries.

A study by the Harvard School of Public Health showed that 51 percent of male college students and 40 percent of female college students engaged in binge drinking in the previous two weeks. Half of these drinkers binged frequently (more than three times per week). College students who binge drink report:

Interruptions in sleep or study habits (71 percent).
Caring for an intoxicated student (57 percent).
Being insulted or humiliated (36 percent).
An unwanted sexual experience (23 percent).
A serious argument (23 percent).
Damaging property (16 percent).
Being pushed, hit or assaulted (11 percent).
Being the victim of a sexual advance assault or date rape (1 percent).

Students must arrive on college campuses with the ability to resist peer pressure and knowing how to say no to alcohol. For many youngsters away from home for the first time, it is difficult to find the courage to resist peer pressure and the strength to answer peer pressure with resounding no. Parents should foster such ability in their child's early years and nurture it throughout adolescence. Today’s youth needs constant care from parents and community support to make the best decisions for their wellbeing.

References
Centers for Disease Control and Prevention
Harvard School of Public Health
National Youth Violence Prevention Center

Sue Scheff: Early Alcohol Prevention

by Connect with Kids

“If you have your first drink before age 14, you're 4 times more likely to develop alcoholism in your life than if you wait until after age 20.”

– Susan Tapert, Ph.D.

By the sixth grade most kids are trading in their dolls and toys for other hobbies like organized sports, clubs at school, and endless hours on the Internet. But, according to new research, around age 11, some kids may be trading their barbies for booze. When do most kids start drinking alcohol? Kim was only 12 when she started.

“I was drinking and then I was smoking, and then I tried so many different drugs,” says Kim, 15.

“She was experimenting with drugs and liquor. We had to put all the liquor away in the house, and she was going to friends houses and sampling,” says Jim Skinner, Kim’s father.

According to a study by the University of Minnesota, one in six children start drinking by the sixth grade. Research shows the earlier kids start the more likely they are to become addicted.

“If you have your first drink before age 14, you’re 4 times more likely to develop alcoholism in your life than if you wait until after age 20,” says Susan Tapert, Ph.D.

That’s why, experts say, the first line of defense against alcohol and drugs is parents who talk to their kids often and start when they’re young.

“You know, I can’t tell you how many times parents come in and they have never, never approached the word drugs or alcohol with their kids. They just want to ignore it. If they ignore it- it will go away and their kid won’t be involved,” says Shirley Kaczmarski Ed.D., educational director.

“Let them know the risks of their behaviors, and what the consequences might be and you can help them with handling those situations, and knowing what to do in order to avoid them,” says Rhonda Jeffries, M.D., pediatrician.

After months in counseling and a year in a school for troubled teens Kim is now drug and alcohol free.

“I’m very proud of myself,” says Kim.

The study also found the earlier kids start drinking, the less receptive they are to alcohol prevention programs.

Tips for Parents

Alcohol is a depressant, which means it slows the function of the central nervous system. Alcohol actually blocks some of the messages trying to get to the brain. This alters a person's perceptions, emotions, movement, vision, and hearing. (Nemours Foundation)

An effective way for parents to show care and concern is to openly discuss the use and possible abuse of alcohol and other drugs with their teenager.

Warning signs of teenage alcohol and drug abuse may include:

Physical: Fatigue, repeated health complaints, red and glazed eyes, and a lasting cough.

Emotional: personality change, sudden mood changes, irritability, irresponsible behavior, low self-esteem, poor judgment, depression, and a general lack of interest.

Family: starting arguments, breaking rules, or withdrawing from the family.

School: decreased interest, negative attitude, drop in grades, many absences, truancy, and discipline problems.

Social problems: new friends who are less interested in standard home and school activities, problems with the law, and changes to less conventional styles in dress and music.

The Consequences of Underage Drinking:

(National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism (NIAAA)

A person who begins drinking as a young teen is four times more likely to develop alcohol dependence than someone who waits until adulthood to use alcohol.

During adolescence significant changes occur in the body, including the formation of new networks in the brain. Alcohol use during this time may affect brain development.

Motor vehicle crashes are the leading cause of death among youth ages 15 to 20, and the rate of fatal crashes among alcohol-involved drivers between 16 and 20 years old is more than twice the rate for alcohol-involved drivers 21 and older. Alcohol use also is linked with youthful deaths by drowning, suicide, and homicide.

Alcohol use is associated with many adolescent risk behaviors, including other drug use and delinquency, weapon carrying and fighting, and perpetrating or being the victim of date rape.
Identifying adolescents at greatest risk can help stop problems before they develop. And innovative, comprehensive approaches to prevention, such as Project Northland, are showing success in reducing experimentation with alcohol as well as the problems that accompany alcohol use by young people. (NIAAA)

References

American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry

National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism (NIAAA)

Nemours Foundation

Girls Drink More Than Boys by Connect with Kids

“I think because of this pressure, the girls find that alcohol lessons their inhibitions. It also represses their emotions, anxieties and fears about it.”

– Annie Prescott, Ph.D., psychologist

In recent decades, girls have been catching up to boys -- and even surpassing them -- in a whole host of categories: test scores, academic achievement, college enrollment, graduate degrees. But in one area, girls outdoing boys is not good news.

Who drinks more alcohol, girls or guys?

“I think girls drink more,” says Diane, 13.

“I think girls drink more,” says Matt, 16.

“I think teenage girls drink more,” says Chris, 15.

In fact, a growing number of studies, including a recent survey from Columbia University, show that girls are now drinking more than boys. But why?

“Girls drink more because they try to fit in more. They’re so worried about fitting in and everything,” says Ally, 13.

Experts say there is more pressure on girls than ever before to be good athletes, to get good grades, and, at the same time, to be popular, beautiful and sexy.

“I think because of this pressure, the girls find that alcohol lessons their inhibitions. It also represses their emotions, anxieties and fears about it,” says Annie Prescott, Ph.D., psychologist.

“They want the guys’ attention; they want to show them they are cool and stuff,” says Diane.

Experts say teen girls need to be busy with activities that reinforce their worth and help them create an identity separate from alcohol, sex and boys.

“Sports and church activities, music, art, dance … activities where there are some social groups that don’t promote this type of acting out,” says Prescott.

All the while, she says, parents need to watch closely.

“I’m talking about being a detective -- that you are following up with them. Are they actually where they say they’re going to be? So they know that they have to be accountable,” says Prescott.

Tips for Parents

• According to J. Edward Hill, president-elect of the American Medical Association (AMA), “The difference in female physiology means that teen girls feel greater impairment from alcohol and encounter alcohol-related problems faster, including brain damage, cancer, cardiac complications, and other medical disorders."
  
  
• Drinking alcohol puts girls' health at risk in other ways, too. Many girls lose their virginity while drunk; in one study of unplanned pregnancies in 14 -21 year olds, one third of the girls who had gotten pregnant had been drinking when they had sex – 91 percent of them reported that the sex was unplanned. (Parents: The Anti-Drug; Flanigan et al., 1990)
  
  
• Nearly one quarter of sexually active teens and young adults say they have had unprotected sex because they were using alcohol or drugs at the time. (Kaiser Family Foundation, 2002) One in four drove a car after drinking or rode with a driver who had been drinking.
  
  
• Moreover, alcohol's ability to reduce inhibitions can be a shortcut to girls who "feel enormous pressure to have sex." The push to be sexy often goes hand in hand with the pressure to drink. (The Christian Science Monitor)
  
  
• People who begin drinking early in life run the risk of developing serious alcohol problems, including alcoholism, later in life. They also are at greater risk for a variety of adverse consequences, including risky sexual activity and poor performance in school. (National Institutes of Health, NIH)
  
  
• Drinking alcohol is bad for your brain and your health, but kids who drink can decide to be successful at stopping. Caring adults can teach kids how to give and receive respect, take better care of themselves, and make better choices. Nemours Foundation

References

• Parents: The Anti-Drug
  
  
• Kaiser Family Foundation
  
  
• Substance Abuse & Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA)
  
  
• The Christian Science Monitor
  
  
• National Institutes of Health (NIH)
  
  
• Nemours Foundation

Sue Scheff: Connect with Kids: Drug Conversation

“The parents need to be very clear at saying. I am not giving you permission to do that. I am not telling you that it’s a good idea, I’m telling you that it’s a bad idea. And here’s why it’s a bad idea. That’s why we have rules now as your parents because we’ve learned from our own mistakes.”
– Nancy McGarrah, Ph.D., child psychologist

“People just automatically assume that we do drugs and drink,” says Blaze, 15.
They have long hair and play in a rock-and-roll band, but Blaze and his twin brother Reid have never even experimented with drugs.

“Our parents expect us to be ourselves and do what we think is right and know that drugs are stupid and a waste of time, and that we shouldn’t be doing them, “ says Blaze.

They’ve been hearing that message from their parents since they were very young.

“It’s pretty clear that if we’re ever caught doing drugs or anything like that then, we’re going to be punished severely,” says Reid, 15.

According to a new survey from the partnership for a drug-free America, the number of parents talking to their children about drugs has dropped 12 percent since 2005.

“You know I can’t tell you how many times parents come in and they have never, never approached the word drugs or alcohol with their kids. They just want to ignore it. If they ignore it it will just go away and their kid won’t be involved,” says Shirley Kaczmarski, Ph.D., educator.

“If a parent does assume that, there’s a good chance that the kids will do it, because it’s like saying ‘you have my permission’, basically,” says Lynn, the twin’s mother.

Experts say, if you end up talking about your own experiences with drugs when you were young, make sure your kids don’t misinterpret that to mean drug use is ok.

“The parent needs to be very clear at saying. I am not giving you permission to do that. I am not telling you that it’s a good idea, but I’m telling you that it’s a bad idea. And here’s why it’s a bad idea.

That’s why we have rules now as your parents because we’ve learned from our own mistakes, ” says Nancy McGarrah, Ph.D., child psychologist.

“We’ve talked about specific incidences with people that we’ve known in the past (friends that we’ve lost in the 9th grade, you know, so and so died of drugs and things like that) there’s no good outcome to it. It’s a poor choice,” says Lynne.

That’s now the opinion of her twins.

“If you know the risks of the drugs, then you probably won’t do it. You’ll realize how stupid it is,” says Blaze.

Tips for Parents

Be an involved parent. (American Academy of Pediatrics, AAP)

Show interest in your teenager’s activities and friends.

Talk openly, honestly, and respectfully with your teenager.

Set clear limits and expectations.

Know what’s going on at school and after school.

Teach your teenager how to safely avoid violence.

Encourage independence while teaching safety. (AAP)

As teenagers are testing their new independent roles, it’s not an easy time for parents, but if teens don’t get love, security, and a feeling of safety from their family, they might look elsewhere, even toward friends who are a bad influence, such as gang members.

One of the best ways parents can help their teenagers stay safe is to teach them how to avoid violence.

Positive communication is very important.

Good communication involves talking and listening with your teenager.

Your goal is to have open, respectful, and honest conversations.

Teens need to feel loved and that their point of view is respected, even when you disagree. (AAP)

Respect your child’s thoughts and opinions without judging them. Support your child’s interests and strengths, but don’t force things.

(National Institute of Child Health and Human Development, NICHD)

Parents need to be careful about how they express approval or disapproval. Parents who are harsh in their disapproval may hurt their children’s self-esteem; parents who never express disapproval may raise children who can’t deal with any criticism.

Try to find a balance between expressions of approval and disapproval. Be consistent in your rewards and punishments. (NICHD)

References

American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP)

National Institute of Child Health and Human Development (NICHD)

Sue Scheff: Preteens Get Alcohol from Home by Emily Halevy

“I woke up in the driver’s seat, blood all over me, glass everywhere. The doctors said my friend had 48 hours to live.”
– Nick, 19

Nick, who wishes to remain anonymous, started drinking when he was 12 years old.

“I loved it. I was off to the races then. It made me feel 10 feet tall and bulletproof,” says Nick, now 19.

Where did he get his first taste?

”I think it was off of some Jack Daniels I got out of my parents’ liquor cabinet,” says Nick.

In fact, according to a report published in the journal, Preventive Medicine, preteens are more likely to get alcohol from their own home or a friend’s home than any other place.

“I think parents are just oblivious to the fact that their kids are drinking,” says Ari Russell, substance abuse prevention director at Guide, Inc. (Gwinnett United in Drug Education in Georgia).

“They just think that they are too young to start thinking about alcohol. And so they are not checking their supplies, they are not seeing the whiskey going down in the bottle.

Is there a beer missing from the refrigerator?

Is there a wine cooler missing from the refrigerator? They are not even paying attention to it.”

Experts say the younger children start drinking, the more likely they are to suffer damage to their brain, heart and liver, and the less likely they are to ever put the bottle down.

“If they start drinking before age 15, the chances of them developing alcoholism are much greater because they are learning early on to use alcohol as a social crutch,” says Russell.

Nick’s last drink was more than a year ago, and it was the night he totaled his truck while drinking and driving.

“I woke up in the driver’s seat, blood all over me, glass everywhere. The doctors said my friend had 48 hours to live,” says Nick.

Nick’s mom says if she had to do it over again, she’d make sure the alcohol was out of his reach.
“It wasn’t that easily accessible; I would certainly make it totally inaccessible,” says Kathy, Nick’s mother.

Tips for Parents

Send your children a clear and consistent message that you do not want them to drink before the age of 21.

Do not make exceptions for special occasions like prom parties, spring break or graduation parties. Kids who are allowed to drink at home will believe “drinking is no big deal to my parents.” This will make them more likely to drink outside the home. (Dr. Michael Fishman, addiction specialist)

Lock up your alcohol. Two-thirds of teens admit they have stolen liquor from their parents without their parents’ knowledge. (Teenage Research Unlimited)

Inform your children about the risks of underage drinking. Research from the VA Medical Center in San Diego shows that the part of the brain responsible for memory and certain learning functions (the hippocampi) is affected by alcohol. Hippocampi in the brains of teenagers who drink were, on average, about 10 percent smaller than the hippocampi in the brains of non-drinking teens. If the hippocampi are damaged, it can affect a person’s memory and ability to learn certain functions. (American Medical Association)

Underage drinking is also associated with future alcohol dependence. Analyses of data from the National Epidemiologic Survey on Alcohol and Related Conditions show that people who began drinking before age 15 are four times more likely to develop alcohol dependence during their lifetime than those who began drinking at age 21 or later.

References

The American Medical Association (AMA)

Teenage Research Unlimited

Dr. Michael Fishman, addiction specialist